By John C. Friel Ph.D., Linda D. Friel M.A.
It really is expected that as many as 34 million humans grew up in alcoholic houses. yet what in regards to the remainder of us? What approximately households that had no alcoholism, yet did have perfectionism, workaholism, compulsive overeating, intimacy difficulties, melancholy, difficulties in expressing emotions, plus the entire different character qualities that may produce a kinfolk procedure very like an alcoholic one? numerous thousands folks fight with these types of dysfunctions each day, and till very lately we struggled by myself. Pulling jointly either concept and medical perform, John and Linda Friel offer a readable rationalization of what occurred to us and the way we will be able to rectify it.
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Additional info for Adult children: the secrets of dysfunctional families
By the time she entered the two-year nursing program she was 100 pounds overweight, but she never let it get her down. She excelled in the nursing program and was working full-time only three weeks after graduation. At the age of 25 Sandy Dorset started dating a young man who she felt must have been sent to her from heaven. He was gentle, caring, even nurturing, and he was attending the university to become a counselor. They never talked about her weight problem, but in the back of her mind she worried that it would eventually turn him off.
Frank was a workaholic, and Tina Davis did the only thing she knew how to do in the face of a loved one's addiction she let her own addiction escalate. At first she was addicted to Frank, waiting up for him when he was continually late at the office, reheating meals she had prepared hours before, nurturing and supporting Frank and his addiction, and denying the slowly-building resentment that at last burst forth in a flash of rage. In the end, she joined him in his addiction, taking on more and more work herself to try to blot out the frightening feelings that kept coming to the surface, and that she had never been taught how to deal with herself.
What Are Our Symptoms? 17 4. Some Hooks: Addictions In Particular 31 Interlude 5. The Bear 43 Part II Family Roots 45 6. Family Systems: Structure, Function, Roles, Boundaries 47 7. The Traps Get Set 63 8. When Families Get Off Course 71 Interlude 9. The Goose 93 Part III What Happens to Me? 99 10. The Denial 101 11. The Feelings 107 12. The Secrets 117 Page x 13. What Happens To Our Identity 123 14. Intimacy and Beyond 133 Interlude 15. The Rabbit 149 Part IV Beneath The Iceberg 153 16. A General Model of Adult Children and Co-dependency 155 Part V Recovering: What Do I Do Now?